Beberapa hari ini suka merenung, membayangkan banyak hal. Too much things on my head.
It’s about job, about relationship, about wedding things, life, gosh.. They drive me crazy!!
Job is getting tough. Feel like on the deep and lower part. Somehow i feel like it’s not my passion anymore. I didn’t make people happy anymore, while i know i work on hospitality and service industry. I keep suggesting myself that it’s only a job. Its not forever, its not everlasting. But back to years ago, i feel i could work with happy face, happy feeling. Because i know i am going to see new people today. But now?? I am going to work harder today, what business i could lock? How much revenue i could gain? How many room nights you could deal? How many events do you get? Gosh.. I am getting sucks, fed up. People keep put their mask, and i feel its not a healthy environment.
I am confused, apart of that uncomfortable things, they pay me better. But again, is it all about money? Is it all about materialistic things?
I am a person who value a relationship, i value people. I keep thinking that i am not doing that again, money drives me to further from that. I am no longer being nice to my client, because i need their money and business. How bad i am.. :(
I dont want to be that person anyway!
I need to find a way to get out from here. Its not my comfort zone and i have to be away.
I feel lonely because i am with wrong people, which i dont know are they really respect me?
Writing this makes me wanna cry. I thought new life in new company will bring new energy. In fact, i didnt get it.
So, if you really passion about something, keep that passion and do not be disturbed by other distraction.
And again, are you really work for money or for your own destiny? Choose that way..